Autobiography, circa 1994

June 17, 2007

I was roaming around my media folders and came across a copy of a diskette containing several pieces of writing from third grade.

First, an autobiography:

The time was 10:14 am, the date was November 14, 1985. All I heard was “It’s a boy, no it’s a girl, no it’s a boy!” My name is Timothy James (T.J.) VanSlyke Jr. If I were a girl, (which I’m glad I’m not!), my name would have been Catherine. They named me after my dad. That is also the reason they named me what they did.

My family members are my mom, my dad, Adam, Chris, and I. My mom is 35 years old, and she’s a nice and indulgent mom. She has brown eyes and brown hair. She’s German-Italian and is a homemaker, but can be a teacher. My dad is 35 also. He has brown eyes and brown hair. He’s sort of strict, but hardly ever grumpy. My mom and dad were both born in the same month as their holiday (Father’s Day and Mother’s Day). My brother, Adam, is 7 years old. He loves hockey, but sometimes he goes a little too far and he thinks it’s a wrestling match. He is also a little high-tempered. He has brown eyes and brown hair, and wears hearing aids. My other brother, Chris, is almost 5 (he’ll turn 5 in November). He loves playing with his toy figures, and also loves Power Rangers. He has blue eyes and blonde hair. Now I’ll tell you about the houses that I’ve lived in. I’ve lived in Utica, Sherrill, and Dryden. The first place I lived in was a little apartment in Ithaca. That was where I was born. Then we moved to Utica when I was about one. We lived in a little one-story house on Cosby Manor Road. It had three bedrooms, one bathroom, and red siding. We lived there until I was about six. After that, we moved to Sherrill. Sherrill was a nice, little city, (It’s the smallest city in NY!) where lots of nice people live and play together. Sherrill was the best place I’ve ever lived. Our house had two and a half bathrooms, four bedrooms, a nice kitchen, a deck, and a front porch. I wish I lived there again! I live in Dryden now. We live in a house on Bear Circle. It’s a nice place because there’s hardly ever any traffic. We have a really spacious house. It has everything that the house in Sherrill did. The only difference is one less bedroom.

As you know, the first special event was me being born. But at the age 1, I had my first camping trip. At age 2, I had my first Halloween party and I was a clown. At age 2½, my brother, Adam was born. At age 4, I went to nursery school for the first time and my teacher’s name was Mrs. Bedell. And here’s the most crazy, I had my first birthday and I cried! I got a book, puzzles, an Ernie doll, a Cabbage Patch doll, and a sled. I ate chocolate cake and got it all over the place. On my first Easter, I got a rabbit doll that I still have. I was 7 months old when I first crawled, 13 months old when I first walked, and 2 years old when I first talked. My baptism was done by Father William M. Barrett when I was 3 months old.

Lots of things are very important to me that I got and started in my later years. I started school in 1990. I got my first computer. It was a little computer with a little hard drive. We got our 2nd computer in 1992. It had a 107 MB hard drive and a 25 MhZ 486 processor. It also had a 2400 baud modem. Our third computer is a really, really nice one. We still have it. It has a 75 MhZ Pentium processor. It also has a 1 GB hard drive, 14,400 baud modem, and tons of software. I started school in Utica. I went through kindergarten and then moved to Sherrill. I finished kindergarten in Sherrill, and went through 1st and 2nd. Then we moved to Dryden and went through 3rd, 4th, and 5th. The worst thing that ever happened to me was that my brother had to go to the hospital. The best thing was that we got a really cool computer. Another thing that happened to me in 1990 is that my brother was born.

I am T.J. VanSlyke, the lover of computers and technology. I am almost 10 years old (10 in November). I have brown eyes and brown hair. I love to help people out and I thirst for knowledge. I would like to be a computer programmer when I grow up. I’m very polite and not very athletic. I take saxophone lessons and I can really entertain myself.

My favorite color is blue. I also like teal. My favorite song is Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me by Elton John. I consider sitting down and fooling with the computer a good time. One of the famous people that I like is Bill Gates because he was the one who invented Windows. My favorite book series is Goosebumps by R.L. Stine.. I really, really, really love seafood. One of the things that I hate is when my brothers argue with me.

I hope to be a computer programmer when I grow up. I’d like to get my PhD in science and technology. I want to go to MIT for college. I also hope to own a little kitten and an IBM ThinkPad. I want to have a nice wife and 3 kids. I also wish I could be as famous as Bill Gates!

I am especially curious what I really meant when I described my mother as “nice and indulgent.” Alas, the vocabulary of a third grader.

I will continue to post these nuggets of prepubescent ponderings as they turn up.